Notes from the multio regional singles conference, feb 24 –
26
The conference began on a Friday night. Much to my delight
most of my old ward were volunteers. It
was a delight to see them throughout the weekend and to say hello.
Saturday morning was choir practice. 7:30 am. I had thought
I would make friends at choir, and this was my one chance to actually connect with
people because, historically, that’s what I do.
This did not happen. I was
delighted to see Sister Barlow was the accompanist. She and I chatted while I
helped get the music folders sorted. The
choir director, Rob Gardner, was late.
So, the lady hosting the event got the choir organized into clumps of
voice parts and began having us sing.
Bro Gardner blew in, changed all the music, and transformed the entire
rehearsal into a screaming race. I got
really angry. Don’t go faster than the
people with you can go. Don’t be hateful
and controlling. And please don’t
castrate every man in the choir by insisting that only tenor lines are worthy
of singing, especially when you have 20 basses and 1 tenor. I could handle the speed and tempo of the
rehearsal but I disliked someone expecting professionalism from an amateur
choir when he couldn’t be bothered to show up on time. I dislike someone who barks at me for not
moving fast enough but feels comfortable stopping rehearsal to give a long
lecture as to why we need to watch him.
If I’m not watching you it’s because you aren’t giving me anything I should watch.
Breakfast was immediately afterwards. I saw Caroline and her friends, and then had
to focus on un-grumping myself. I can’t
make friends or listen to anything when I’m super angry.
Saturday officially began with a “Morningside”, which is a
morning fireside. Brad Wilcox and his
daughter spoke. Before they did there
was a cello solo and I was highly amused that a dude behind me felt comfortable
answering his cell phone and having a conversation DURING the solo.
So, when a popular inspirational speaker gives a talk with
his daughter, it apparently means they both stand at the pulpit together and
she smiles and looks pretty for most of his talk. Then, she gets to read a
little bit, and he goes back to talking.
She is a gorgeous girl in her suit and pearls but it was a little too
1950’s for me.
From his talk: “We
don’t earn our way to heaven. We learn
our way to Heaven. The requirements God
gives us aren’t just to prove us but to improve us. Focus on the why and not the what. We came to this earth to utilize the
Atonement, to transform us into someone who could not just go home to our
Heavenly Father, but someone who would feel at home in our Father’s
Kingdom. The Atonement saves us from sin
but also saves us for eternity. The
Atonement is a doctrine of development.
Pray for help. The sacrament
perfects us. The temple is to make us
like Christ. In fact, every sacrifice
helps to make us become like Christ and Christ prepares us for heaven.Also in Bro Wilcox’s talk was the first time the last verse
to “Away In A Manger” (Hymns 206) was mentioned. These are the words:
Be
near me, Lord Jesus; I ask thee to stay
Close by me forever, and love me, I pray.
Bless all the dear children in thy tender care,
And fit us for heaven to live with thee
there.
- The first class was by David Crandall, an anthropologist who has spent the last 22 years living in South East Africa. He said his class was about the joy we find in meeting friends and strangers along our journey. He read the hymn Each Life That Touches Ours For Good and then told three stories about people which were specifically designed to make you cry. Homeless Korean opera singers, Nazis being nice to people, African men who cheated on their wives. It was an odd bunch of stories that he never tied together or gave any sort of thesis for. He just left them there for you to do with as you wish. Perfect for an anthropologist. J
- The second period was taken up with videos and art presentation by Liz Lemon Swindle. There was one quote I liked. “When your spirit finally lines up with your gifts and abilities then you can do the work you were sent to do.” The rest of the time was taken up in shilling for Jesus. Since I very much dislike mediocre art which exploits LDS culture, I did not leave the class in a pleasant mood.
- I quickly grabbed some lunch and ran to the third class which was by Mark Swint. The class was “Looking forward with Joyful Anticipation to… THE END OF THE WORLD!!!” I seriously loved this class and this dude. He is a pilot who decides to do things and then just does them. He wrote a book called Compare Isaiah because he wanted to write a book about the most boring part of the Book of Mormon. He also said that it is hard to get a book about doctrine published if you aren’t a BYU professor. FYI
- Revelations 16:16
- The word Armageddon is from a word which simply means the great plain near Jerusalem where a battle will take place. It is NOT Bruce Willis and asteroids. The word Apocalypse means “lifting the veil, revelation” and not skeletons riding horses. All the scary stuff people think is foundationless.
- Apocalyptic revelation is when the ENTIRE WORLD knows that Jesus Christ is the savior. Apocalyptic revelations have been had by every prophet, when they see all things from beginning to end, when the veil is lifted and nothing can be hidden.
- So, then let’s talk about his burning up of the wicked. There is lots of “burning” in the scriptures and very little of it has to do with actual fire. Prophesies are usually fulfilled with very little drama. Burning is related to what Alma the Younger felt when he was trapped in a hell of a perfect understanding of his own guilt. (Alma 36 & 37) The destruction of the wicked is the end of the world, and the “world” is NOT the earth. The “World” is wickedness and rottenness and general hatefullnes that we will be glad is gone. Burning will be what is felt by those who cannot escape the pure knowledge of their awful actions. AND wickedness is NOT confined to any particular demographic, so don’t even think that. Basically, life will be nice.
- When Christ came to the Americas, the taught and baptized the people. This means there were a lot of good people who weren’t saints. There are a lot of good people in the world who will recognize and welcome the Savior. We come from a really Protestant tradition so there is all this angst about worthiness. Guilt isn’t right. We take a scripture which says “endure to the end” and add on “…in righteousness” at the end. That’s not how the scripture ends. It just says to KEEP ON GOING. Malachi 4. The Savior brings healing. He never says anyone is going to hell because it’s never over. Just get back up and keep going. It’s never over.
- The function of the commandments is to make us comfortable with Christ. There was an echo of the hymn from the Morningside, reflecting the “fit us for heaven” concept. Alma the Younger was released from his pain when he was beset by a burning knowledge of his guilt. Alma called upon the Lord and was released from that pain so he could begin the process of repentance. The Atonement releases us and helps us progress. The Atonement is a doctrine of progression. And, the gospel is a blessing of peace. D&C 59:23.
- We can have peace in this life AND in the eternal life to come. Don’t wait for your peace which is your birthright as a child in the kingdom. The promises in the scriptures all reflect this. Peace and long life, do not be troubled or afraid. When Jesus comes again we will welcome him. Everyone will see it at once so it will probably be on TV. No need to make it magic. We can greet him with joy and peace and if you don’t feel peace in your life now it’s because you aren’t asking for it.
- Ask the Lord for His peace and look forward to His coming with joy.
- The fourth class was Choosing to Find Joy in Choosing to Be Faithful As a Single Adult by Todd L. Goodsell. He gave everyone a lovely little half-page handout on grey marbled cardstock. On it was a list of ten things to do: 1. Get a friend. 2. Appreciate married people. 3. Get feedback on yourself. 4. Be healthy (physically and mentally.) 5. Get an education. 6. Get your finances in order. 7. Let God and the Church be part of the solution (not the WHOLE solution.) 8. Make a difference in the world. 9. Learn to talk about your life honestly. 10. Accept that pain is part of mortality.
- And that’s the list. I really didn’t want to be in that class when I walked in because Bro. Goodsell is single and there was a lot of quiet fluttering being done by the single women in the room. But, it was a really good class and Goodsell did a bit of quiet peacocking himself so it all worked out. I mean, I can understand why he mentioned his degree, the service he’s done, the marathons he’s run, and his work in his stake high council but the only reason to tell us that he has a perfect BMI is because he just couldn’t help himself. So that was amusing. Anyway, there were some really good quotes. Here are a few.
- “Do not give up hope and do not give up trying but do give up being obsessed with it.” --Pres Hinkley. Getting feedback from others is helpful but not all feedback is valid. Being healthy mentally and physically helps you keep functional in the future. Picture what you want to be doing in 20 years and do what it takes now to reach that goal. Living the gospel makes it difficult to marry. By living the gospel you have a much smaller pool of potential suitors but if the gospel is an integral part of your life, compromising those values and goals will not make you happy. Don’t hide in the basement. Pick a problem and get out there to help. Don’t wait for someone to tell you to do good. Find work that fulfills you.
- Honesty does not mean that you get what you want.
- Life is not a failure if you have experienced pain. “We want people to be healthy more than we want them to be safe.” Stuff hurts. The process of becoming like God involves learning those feelings. (Because we are being “fit for heaven” perhaps?)
- Goodsell also discussed the BYU honors list, telling a story about how he, in college, was aggravated that his Southern California education had not introduced any of the books from that list to him in high school. Eventually he stopped complaining and just began reading the books. He began naming books I have never heard of. This made me mad. I am a fairly well-read person so if there is a list of classic works that I haven’t heard of then that needs to be fixed RIGHT NOW. Here is the link: http://honors.byu.edu/files/GreatWorksList.pdf
- I skipped the 5th class because I was exhausted. I sat in the lobby and listened to some 40ish dudes assess the kind of tail attending the conference. I was not surprised that they were single. I also talked to Jeana Cheny, Bishop Ury, and several other people from my old ward. I was delighted to see them.
- The 6th class I attended was Joy in Personal Revelation by Tom Wilson. Bro Wilson was in my old ward (I had his daughter in my primary class) and he is also in the stake presidency and teaches seminary for a living. He has some interesting issues surrounding clothing which I have yet to figure out. However, odd concepts regarding modesty and dressing up and these sort of presentational and representational elements of clothing always come up when he speaks. Someday I will discover why and what it is exactly about his ideas that sit with me wrong.
- Anyway, he said that everything in the gospel is designed so that we can have the Holy Ghost with us to guide and teach us. When you walk into any situation, pray for the spirit to teach you so that you can pull the inspiration and learning you need out of wherever you are. Church meetings aren’t for socializing or business but for being taught and edified. (I may or may not believe this.)
- The pattern for revelation is not “the burning in the bosom” which, in scripture, is specific to the translation of the Book of Mormon, but instead is felt in your mind and in your heart. Feelings of serenity and peace are better than the drama of a big thing. Just relax. Revelation comes from time to time, little by little, and guides you along. D&C 8:23.
- Anything which messes with your mind or heart can derail the revelatory process. Smut books, anger, stress, fatigue, poor diet, no exercise, whatever. D&C 128:1 Having someone occupy your mind or press upon your feelings is the Holy ghost talking to you. Go outside and think about it.
- Impressions to the heart are general. A general feeling requires a response. Do something. Then hear the thoughts which come to you which are specific messages or direction. Then the feelings might change to lead you to something else. Heart, action, mind, heart. Don’t worry about doing something wrong. You will be warned if it’s something stupid or wrong. Just move forward and know that God trusts you to do what’s good and right.
- It is thru the repeated process of feeling impressions, recording them, and obeying them that one learns to depend on the direction of the Spirit more than the five senses. Record your impressions. They are powerfully rewarded if you write it down and do it RIGHT NOW. God may not repeat himself. Write while in the Spirit.
Sunday
I arrived late to choir practice because I didn’t like the
director. The choir stood on risers for
the entire hour rehearsal. It got to be
kind of fun to sing but then the director started shouting at the sopranos when
they didn’t magically guess what he wanted so I checked out. I actually had to hide my face with the music
after he began a lecture with “I know I can be kind of hard but….” so as to not
show my feelings. I also had to hide
when he started a lecture about how important it is to bear your testimony and
worked it round to meaning everyone there had so slavishly follow his every
un-transmitted thought in order to express their love for Jesus. I REALLY don’t like him. But, music is music and people will tolerate
almost any level of abuse in order to feel the spirit that comes of testifying
of Christ along with our brothers and sisters in song so he got a lot of “oh,
you are wonderful!” sort of comments. Which
is fine as long as he doesn’t expect them to come from me.
On a side note, I always wonder why people don’t understand
that their set of rules are simply stylistic habits. We got corrected on our vowel sounds, which
is standard, and were told to keep them long and open rather than wide and flat
in order to not sound “American”. This was
rich because it came right after being told to say a word a certain way because
“that’s how you actually say it.” Long A’s
or wide A’s, finial explosive T’s and D’s, all the habits that make a “good” choir
are just English affectations. I can
comply to them with ease but they aren’t right because they are best practice,
they are done because it’s common practice.
Having a choir sing wide and smiley and broad wouldn’t be bad at all, it
just wouldn’t meet choir geek standards of “correctness.”
Anyway, better was the string/piano ensemble from Karen Rosser
and Kenny Kuhn from my current ward. It was
so beautiful it made me cry during rehearsal.
I went out walking with Karen afterwards and missed the first choir
number. I wasn’t sad.
Sister Thompson from the Relief Society general presidency
spoke at sacrament meeting. She was
cute. Ether 12:41. She arrived on Saturday night and was
inspired to read us the third verse of Away in a Manger during her talk. Unknown to her, we had heard this verse the
day before. “to fit us for Heaven.” Seriously was the real theme of the
conference.
I had trouble listening to Sister Thompson because A) my
chair kept squeaking and shifting and I was terrified that it would break and
B) I kept thinking about something else.
Earlier, before sacrament started, I was traipsing across the room to
go chat with Karen Rosser and Marsha Theriot and I walked by Bro Goodsell who was
sitting on the front row. He nodded and said
hello, which surprised me, and then warned me not to trip on the cables which
were taped to the floor. I saw his
choice of seat was directly over the cables and laughed with delight at his
decision to sit there and warn everyone.
I said “way to patrol!” and walked on but not before I saw that I had
made him uncomfortable. Go me.
Anyway, he kept coming to mind during the meeting because I
realized that I had completely dismissed him and there was no good reason for
it. I mean, Sociology might be a soft
science but that’s no reason not to be friendly. I kept thinking about him which meant
that there was something there I need to learn.
So I started writing. My notes say “Why did I dismiss him? Maybe I want to be
slightly pompous? Is that who I truly
am? Careful and carefree? Controlled and
forgiving? Neat & comely, patient and
quiet, sparkling and funny, weepy and lyrical and mournful and loving? Perhaps he is a reflection of what I truly
want to be.”
I’m not sure what all of that means. But what I’m choosing to take away from the
experience is to not be so quick to dismiss folks. I think I’m missing out on cool people.
The last quote I have recorded from Sis Thompson is this: “The
Lord is near us when we let him and is with us always if we allow it.”
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